Welcome To The Darkside

tehehehe

2006-05-24T07:07:05Z

Fill in the blanks even if you have absolutely no idea what they are. Oh, && make sure to post this in your journals so I can try...&& of course get them all right!

My name:

Where did we meet:

Take a stab at my middle name:

How long have you known me:

When is the last time that we saw each other:

Do I smoke:

Do I drink:

When is my birthday:

What was your first impression of upon meeting me:

Do I have any siblings:

What's one of my favorite things to do:

Am I funny:

What's my favorite type of music:

What is the best feature about me:

Am I shy or outgoing:

Am I a rebel or do I follow the rules:

Do I have any special talents:

Would you consider me a friend/good friend:

Would you call me preppy, average, sporty, punk, hippie, glam, nerdy, snobby, or something else (what):

What is a memory we have once had:

Have you ever hugged me:

Do you miss me...do you think i miss you:

What is my favorite food:

Have you ever had a crush on me:

If there was one good nickname for me, what would it be:

What's your favorite memory of me:

Who do I like right now:

What is my worst habit:

If you and I were stranded on a desert island, what one thing would I bring?:

Are we friends:

Will you repost this so I can do it for you?:

dances

2006-05-24T03:25:33Z

OMFG!

*dances*

go on and flaunt it what your mumma gave you *uh*

*emo sexes hanusia*

end_of_myself @ 2006-05-09T08:11:00

2006-05-09T00:11:47Z

This Old Love

2006-05-08T14:21:41Z

Yes, yeah we're movin' on
Looking for direction
Mmm mm we've covered much ground
Thinking back to innocence
I can no longer connect
I don' t have a heart left to throw around

Oh, and time moves on like a train
That disappears into the night sky
Yeah, I still get a sad feeling inside to see the red tail lights wave goodbye

We'll grow old together
We'll grow old together
And this love will never
This old love will never die

Well money slips into your hands
And then slips out like it was sand
And those shoes that you could never seem to fill
I've chased so much and lost my way
Maybe a face for every day
That so casually slipped me by

Oh, time moves on like a train
That disappears into the night sky
Yeah, I still get that sad feelin' inside to see the red tail lights wave goodbye

We'll grow old together
We'll grow old together
And this love will never
This old love will never die

Morning comes
Sometimes with a smile
Sometimes with a frown
Yeah so I never want to worry
If your gonna stay around

So let's grow old together
We'll grow old together
And this love will never
This old love will never die

Yes, yeah we're movin' on
Movin' right along

end_of_myself @ 2006-05-05T19:31:00

2006-05-05T11:35:28Z

1.

2.

3.

4.

5.

6.

TADA!

Random yes i know.
What you gonna do about it??

Bum Bum Da Da!

2006-04-06T00:24:26Z

Omg. Hanusia Is A Sped. That Is All.

No Not Really.

There Is More.

*SQUEE* Its Beni's Party On Friday Night.

*SQUEE*

Wow. My Mum Is Really Annoying.

GRRRRR.

*Pokes*

Take That All.

Yeah. That's Right.

P.S My Icon Is Teh Sex. And It's True Too.

end_of_myself @ 2006-04-03T12:13:00

2006-04-03T04:14:36Z

OMFG! *stabs Francesca*

My hair is now short... well not short short just shorter then before kind of short...

Like up to my shoulders..... wow... oh oh...

deary me...

end_of_myself @ 2006-04-03T10:34:00

2006-04-03T02:36:58Z

OMFG!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Sinead is a vampire!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

RUN FOR YOUR LIVES!!!

end_of_myself @ 2006-03-19T18:12:00

2006-03-19T11:47:23Z

Wow....
I had a really good weekend. On Friday Beni came out to Santa to visit me and we spent the afternoon with Smij and Hanusia and Cate and Vicky mucking around in the rec centre. It was so good.

Then Saturday morning I mucked around "doing homework" etc. And then Tarni and Sinead came in to do History and we came up with an interesting play about Christopher Columbus and his hat.

*coughs*

Saturday evening Beni and Joni turned up at around 6:00 and we (aka Me and Smij) played pool against them and lost miserably until Sarah and Shannan turned up. Then we piled 4 people into the 3 seater backseat of the car and drove to Sarahs and piled out again. We then spent the next 4 hours mucking around and Beni and I held hands for most of the evening (Thats it i swear!) and that was nice. To just hold hands and not do anything else. It was sweet. Then at 11 their dad rocked up and they left.

Soon after several guys dropped their pants to the Eagle Rock and Shannan gave me private salsa lessons which were only slightly un-coordinated on my part.

Then at 12ish all the big people left and me and Smij raided the house for alcohol and spent the next couple of hours watching Love Actually, Vanity Fair and drinking coke and vodka in varying degrees of toxicity!

At 3 Sarah and Shannan returned and then at 4 the rest of the crowd trailed in. We stayed up until 4:30 finishing Love Actually and then crashed and woke up at 8:30ish... We then made pancakes (choc chip pancakes!) and got dressed into our bathers... At 11:30ish Sarah and Shannan dropped us off at the Fremantle Train Station and we caught the train to Cottesloe.

We then preceded to observe the scenery and frolick in the water for the next couple of hours and at 2:30 we left and caught the train back to Fremantle where we went shopping and i bought a pair of the hottest knee high boots, some credit and Forever Young the single.

We then jumped on to the bus and slowly traipsed back to school.

THE END!

No... wait... theres more...
Beni is coming to visit me on Tuesday and then on Friday i might be spending the afternoon with him. Yay!

Luv Bimbo
xox

end_of_myself @ 2006-03-16T13:26:00

2006-03-16T05:28:59Z

OMG I CANT WAIT FOR THE WEEKEND!!!!!!!!!

im over school... i want out....

oh and it was my birthday yesterday!

im 16 and legal! yayness!

luv me!

p.s im in the public speaking finals with tarni and sinead....
grrr you two are going down! lol

end_of_myself @ 2006-03-09T13:40:00

2006-03-09T05:48:27Z

Teasers!

1. 2. 3. 4. 5. 6. 7. 8. 9. 10. 11. 12. 13. 14. 15. 16. 17. 18. 19. 20. 21. 22. 23. 24. 25. 26. 27. 28. 29.

-PLEASE CREDIT!
-NO HOTLINKING!

OH AND SORRY IF THEY ARE CRAP I'VE ONLY JUST STARTED MAKING ICONS! *sheepish grin*

OMFG!

2006-03-01T07:53:16Z

OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG!!!!

JUST GOT MY BRACES OFF AND IT ROCKS MY SOCKS!!!

IT LOOK SOOOO COOL! OMG.... THIS IS SOOO AWESOME!

LUV ME!

end_of_myself @ 2006-02-28T07:10:00

2006-02-27T23:11:56Z

Hell is when you love someone and they don’t love you back.
Hell is the place between love and despair.
Hell is the sound of your tears as they hit your pillow,
And the silent breaking of your heart.
Hell is when he doesn’t look at you the same way anymore.
Hell is when he doesn’t hold on to you like he’ll never let go.
It’s knowing what you’ve done and not being able to fix it.
It’s realising how in love you are.
And Hell is realising he doesn’t love you anymore.

end_of_myself @ 2006-02-27T21:00:00

2006-02-27T13:09:05Z

She stood. Alone.

Always alone, yet never free.

He was always on her mind. Always lurking in the deep recesses of her black, black mind.

There, haunting her, he stood. Not in this world. But in the world inside her head.

She shivered under the cool breeze of the night. The blackness of the night swallowed her and she slipped in and out of reality. She was nothing without him. It was like there was a hole, dying to be filled, yet never truly empty.

The time slipped away like sand in the hour glass as she waited.

Waited for his verdict, waited for the words that seemed never to come.

As the dark turned to dawn she waited still. Enveloped in a dream that would never come true.

She was cold in her thoughts and in her flesh.

She sat quietly, not moving, barely breathing. And waited.

Then suddenly as a thought in the mind he was there.

He walked to her, and whispered the words she had waited for so long to hear.

"I love you"

And they were together now. The wait had been worth it. They were together.

OMFG SHOCK HORROR!

2006-02-27T07:43:33Z

OMFG.
I just had this two page long note convo with Ashlyn (aka Bens cousin).
And she's going to talk to him.
OMFG.
Im scared.
What if he doesnt even listen to her?
Apparently he was REALLY cut when we broke up last year.
Im so sorry i did this to him.
Ashlyn's kept the note we wrote.
I think to use it as a reference when talking to ben but hey.
Who knows?
Ah well.
Wish me luck.

end_of_myself @ 2006-02-26T19:51:00

2006-02-26T11:53:46Z

She felt something break inside her as the whole world fell apart.

It was her fault. Always her fault.

It was her fault they died.

It was her fault the world they had built collapsed.

It was her fault that he looked away.

It was her fault that the light was gone from his eyes.

She was sorry for what she had done but he couldn’t know it.

She was sorry for her mistakes but he couldn’t see it.

She was sorry for breaking his heart but he couldn’t feel it.

She loved him like no one else and he didn’t know.

She missed him like no one else and he didn’t know.

No one understood. No one felt what she felt.

No one else would ever love him like she did.

She would die under his hatred. Suffocate beneath the rippling waves of her embodied love.

Nothing could stop her now. She looked at her self in the mirror and hated herself.

Hated herself for what she had done to him.

She reached for the welcoming shine of the blade and felt the cool metal in her grasp and knew she would die for his love.

Die for what she no longer had and could never regain.

She brought the razor to her skin.

She felt something break inside her as the world fell apart.

I want to die....

2006-02-25T03:10:58Z

I hate myself so much....
I lost one of the most important people to me.
And its all my fault.

I broke up with Ben and now theres nothing i can do to make him want me.
There was only one person i wanted to be with at the social last nite.
And he didnt want to be with me.

I got back from the social last night and cried my eyes out.
Hanusia and Smij curled up on my bed with me.
And listened to my pathetic story.

I feel so stupid and pathetic.
I just want to die.
God how i wish he wanted me.

Rejection is officially the worst feeling in the world.
There were so many people there last night and yet i couldnt escape him.
Everything and everyone reminded me of him.

I wish he knew how sorry i am.
How much i regret not having him in my life.
How much i love him.

I sound so stupid saying that.
But its true.
It couldnt possibly hurt this much if i didnt love him.

Im such a hypocrite.
I bet Ben was feeling exactly the same way a couple of months ago.
To a more or lesser extent.

How i wanted him to dance with me.
Even just look at me like he used to.
I need him.

And what hurts the most is that he doesnt need me anymore....
Just let me slip away.

end_of_myself @ 2006-02-23T13:47:00

2006-02-23T05:56:15Z

wow im so bad... i really should keep up this journaling thingy....

hmmmm.....
IM GOING TO THE HALE BALL! WELL THE YEAR 11 ONE ANYWAYS...
and i might be getting a limo! squee wootage!
so how are you all? hmmm stoopid question considering i go to school with most of you and most of you i have seen at least 3 times today....
urghh im so bored *headdesk*
im going to die of boredom.... or at least become violently ill.... *dies*
wow guess it was die of boredom.....
public speaking rocks my socks....
and im getting my braces off on wednesday next week,.... i will post pictures.... of before and after....
YAYNESS! no more braces....

hmmmmm....
im helping tarni write her public speaking speech and its going to rock everyones socks...
*nods head* yes indeed...
but mines still going to be better....
ISNT THAT RIGHT TARNI? *threatens her with a pen to the jugular* thats what i thought...

hmmm....
All the santa boarders have a social on friday with Hale, Scotch, AC and Christchurch and i am soooooo glad that Wesley is NOT going bcos my ex ex bf goes there and it would be really awkward....
so now i can just have fun with my friends and be random!
YAYNESS!

anywho...

luv me!
xoxoxoxo

end_of_myself @ 2006-02-01T13:05:00

2006-02-01T05:06:21Z

WOW.... i need to update my journal....
soooooo bad..... 'i feel so bad now....*slaps face* bad llama!'
hmmmm well..... holidays were awesome.... broke up with todd..... ben dunbar is HOT..... and thats about it.....
OOOOOOOOOOOOOO AND SQUEE IM IN YR 11!!!! WOOTAGE!

over and out

TODD

2005-11-17T11:57:27Z

OMG!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
hehehehehheheheh *breathes deeply* well.....

Just before Sinead, Hanusia, Tanya, Brittney T and a zillion other people had their Christmas choir thingy..... AND for those of you who dont know..... TODD (yess the todd) well his little sister KATE does year 8 choir...... SO YOU KNOW WHAT THAT MEANS????????????

I GOT TO SEE TODD!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! SQUEEEEEEEEEEEEEE

AND a couple of days ago Todd told me he wanted me to write him a letter soooooooo...... I DID BUT i told him i wanted on in return AND tonight i got my reply....... AND OMG!!!!!!!!!! He is sooooo adorable!!!! *pulls sappy in love sort of face thing* awwwwwwwwwwwww.......... AND he even put some of his polo sport on the letter so it smells like him *ahhhhh breathes in deeply smelling the letter* SQUEEEEEEEEE

omg omg omg omg omg omg omg.......HES SOOOOOOOO CUTE!!!!!!!!!!!!

AND i got to meet the fockers! lol jj but they are really nice...... they didnt eat me or kill me and they dont hate me *claps hands* yay!!!! but they're soooooooo nice and omg.....

I've just read his letter for the millionth billionth time and awwwwwwwwwwwwww *pulls sappy love face again* awwwwww sooooo cute n Tarni insisted on being introduced as did Brittney and Sabrina..... and squeeeee omg........ I THINK IM HYPER.......

LOVE HANNAH!!!!!!!!!!
AKA BIMBO

end_of_myself @ 2005-11-17T16:46:00

2005-11-17T08:56:46Z

HELLO MY GORGESOUNESSES...... *coughs uncomfortably*

anywho.....

I FEEL SOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO MARJORLY ORGANISED! LOL I know have my french books n the notes to go with them, my 2 english lit books, my human biology book n my foundies books!!!!!!!!!! squeeee! excitement!

School has actually been quite fun the last 2 days....*omg shock horror faints on the floor* i know its quite scary but we've done jack all work n this morning in english we had miss serrao as our substitute teacher and me n smij were tormenting her!!! fun fun fun *claps hands* weeeeeeeeeeeeee

ANYWHO...... im going to annoy hanusia now and talk about todd (thought it possibly might annoy a few other people too but oh well *shrugs shoulders*) OMG!!!!!!!!! SQUEEE! He's so cute! lol omg omg omg but i miss him lots.... i dont get to see him very often..... dont know what im going to do in the holidays but you know..... i'll figure it out! lol Ainsley has offered her house as a refuge lol so thats a good thing....

Im actually getting quite excited about the holidays and next year in general....like i cant wait to be there you know? On holidays that is but next year is looking good too.....

hmmmmm but yes i will stop spamming your friends now.... :p

LOVE HANNAH
AKA BIMBO

p.s did i mention Todd was cute? lol

end_of_myself @ 2005-11-06T22:20:00

2005-11-06T14:25:36Z

Hmmmmmm quick update!

-Dad's an arsehole.....but i already knew that and so did most of you....
-Todds adorable and huggable and too good to be true....im going to go all soppy on you now....he makes me feel so special....like theres something ive got that noone else does....hes amazing...
-Elizabethtown is the coolest movies ever!!!! and orlando bloom is the hotness....
-Did i mention todd was gorgeous?
-Banana cake rocks my socks.....
-Todd's adorable
-I've eaten too much fruit salad and urghh....sore stomach! grrr
-Grrrring is cooler then Raaaaing....dont you agree?
-Chocolate is my life!

That is all!

Love Hannah
aka Bimbo

p.s My icon is the sex....and todds soooo cute!

end_of_myself @ 2005-11-04T18:46:00

2005-11-04T10:48:48Z

Oh btw....

I am currently VERY pissed at my dad..... if you want to read my full rant (aka the letter i wrote to himm which i fully intend to send) click

RANT

(btw Brett is my dad)

Brett,

You are one of the most selfish pig headed men I have ever known. How dare you insinuate that mum owes you anything? She owes you nothing. You owe her the 4 beautiful, intelligent children you have and the lives they have made for themselves because of her. You owe her the life she's missed out on because of the hell hole she's been trapped in for the past 8 years trying to provide for us. If anybody owes my mother it is you.

You have no idea of the life she struggles with and still you continue to push and push and make life as hard for her as you possibly can. You're an unbelievable bastard. I HATE YOU. I have never hated anyone else in the world as much as I hate you right now.

Last year it cost mum over $10,000 to send Sarah over seas on a school exchange. Just because Sarah was not living with us does not mean mum was not supporting her. Because that’s what parents do they support their children. Something which you are now refusing to do for me, claiming that you are in credit to mum because you shouldn’t have paid for Sarah last year.

If you did not want to pay for Sarah you should have made that decision last year. You have no right to make me suffer or Mum suffer for your mistakes. I deserve the education I receive at Santa. I deserve it because I work hard for my grades. I work hard for what I have because I know what mum sacrifices to send me here. If you do not pay my fees I will be taken out of school at Santa and will be denied the chance to go to Reunion Island next year.

What more could you possibly want from me? You control my future. For Christ’s sake, stop being such an arrogant pig and except that I don’t want to have a relationship with you. It is my choice, however paying my school fees you have no say in. The court order clearly states that you HAVE to pay. I know what your plan is. You realize tat mum does not have the money or the time to take you to court and you’re abusing her weakness. You know it would cost her more then you owe her to take you to court to get the money.

I don’t know what you have said to Ryan and Scott to make them believe you are a good person and that mum is the bad person but I hate you for it. Because of you I have been denied access to my niece and nephew.
I hope what I’m saying is hurting you because you deserve nothing better. You are self centered and egotistical. I can’t believe you would do this to mum and to me. Well actually I can, by now I expect nothing better from you.

You think you’ve got such a good thing going for you in your house with your ‘children’. But you know what? You can’t hide behind you money or your new age bull forever. Soon enough you’ll have to face the truth that half of your children hate you. How many people have you met that know their children hate them? Not many I’m guessing.

I feel sorry for River and Chase. They will grow up never knowing the truth about their half-sisters and why they refuse to see them. I will never forgive you for this. Ever. You’re not my father. A father would not do this to their children.

You say you want to be a part of my life and then cut off the only contribution you have ever made to my life. Think about it. You have never done anything to contribute to my well being or to the person I am today. And this is not Mum’s fault so stop trying to blame her for everything that goes wrong between you and me.

You think I’m immature? Have a look at yourself. You are to naïve to realise the irreparable damage you are making. I am not bitter. I hate you because of the experiences I have had with you not because of anything mum has said. I hate you because you have made me hate you. I’m glad mum divorced you because I don’t want you as my father. I’m glad she removed you from my life because I am better for it. I know that mum is more of a parent then you have been or ever will be to me. Mum is not bitter, sure it hurts that what you had didn’t work for either of you but she doesn’t harbour a grudge against.

As a matter of fact I do remember the time mum dragged us out of your car and I also remember why. It was the weekend of your wedding to Marie and you were going to go on your honeymoon and Mum didn’t know how we were getting home and you wouldn’t tell her.
I don’t see how Mum and John have anything to do with you and me. You had remarried; Mum had every right to have moved on. And by the way a child’s definition of kissing is a lot different to that of an adult. I was at an age where boys still had cooties, what more did you expect?

The farm is worth over a million dollars on PAPER. That is not expendable cash we have in our hands. You tell me not to believe the poor story? I live in that poor story you arrogant pig! How am I supposed to not believe in something I’m experiencing? You cannot tell me that it is a lie because Mum, Sarah and I struggle with money everyday of our lives while you sit pretty in your house in Salter Point.

Mom had no interaction with the letters I sent you. I posted them myself. STOP TRYING TO BLAME EVERYTHING THAT HAPPENS ON MUM. You’re a grown man its time you took responsibility for your past. You told me you haven’t missed a payment in 14 years? How about the $900 you owe mum in school fees or the $425 dollars you owe her in orthodontic bills? Haven’t missed a payment my ass.

This is not hurting me to say this. It no longer hurts Sarah either. You know why? Because where better then you. Where stronger, more mature and responsible then you will ever be.

You know what Brett, I won’t put up with this behaviour from you anymore. I’ve had enough. This is the last straw. Do the right thing for once in your life.

Oh and please reply, because I’d love to hear the truth about why you haven’t paid my school or orthodontic bills.

Yours sincerely,

Hannah

end_of_myself @ 2005-11-04T18:40:00

2005-11-04T10:46:25Z

If you read this, if your eyes are passing over this right now, even if we don't speak often, please post a comment with a memory of you and me. It can be anything you want--good or bad. When you're finished, post this little paragraph on your blog and be surprised (or mortified) about what people remember about you.

PLEASE comment

end_of_myself @ 2005-11-03T17:10:00

2005-11-03T09:14:56Z

I AM SOOOOOO PISSED OFF RIGHT NOW.....THIS MORNING I FOUND OUT I HAVE A HALF BROTHER....BORN LAST MONTH AND NOBODY FRIGGIN TOLD ME!!!!! I HAVENT SPOKEN TO ME DAD IN OVER A YEAR BUT I THINK I STILL DESERVE TO KNOW WHEN I HAVE A KNEW FUCKING RELATIVE! DONT YOU? I MEAN FOR CRYING OUT LOUD....

i cant believe he didnt tell me....fucking bastard....i hate him....he's not my father....never was and never will be.....i hate him....